Peace out, Tampax!

It seems 2015 is upon us. It also seems that nowadays people can't blog or post anything without someone shutting them down because it's offensive.  Guess what? I'm still here, still offensive, and still going to write whatever I feel.


2014 is gone. thank god. I am trying very hard to believe that we make our own luck and all that jazz, but a lot of shitty things happened last year and to top it all off in the end, our sweet, precious, much loved Nonni passed away. My worst nightmare. My family has not been the same since. It's amazing how one woman can influence a family so much. When she passed, a flame went out within us and I don't think we will ever get it back.

So...here we are. A new year. without Nonni. I am trying hard not to think about it.


I'm still here, still wandering about, still clueless, and still wishing. And very much still wanting to move away from this place, to travel somewhere that we as a family have never been. To have the freedom to pick up and just go somewhere. anywhere. That is my goal for us this new year. To take time and visit a place we have never been.

Perhaps the best thing to start this year off is that in exactly 9 days my uterus is being removed. MY UTERUS IS BEING REMOVED. Let us all praise baby jesus for this! I have waited many, many, many moons for this to happen. I understand there are women out there who are devastated to have theirs removed, and despite the fact that mine is being removed for health reasons, I am not at all unhappy about it. LET'S PARTY. I pray for many things including my health, that my doc has no complications, and that I get the old anesthesiologist who has seen my nether regions before when I had my in office procedure and who already knows what I look like with my clothes off. He's in his 60's, married, has 5 daughters and well--let's face it, he already knows what to expect since he's been there and seen that. Apparently there is a well known, good looking one who shows up to these surgeries and we can't have any of that down there! I only pray that if he is the one, that I am knocked the hell out and don't get a good look at his face to remember him. Have you ever run into a nurse who has taken care of you and seen ALL THE BAD STUFF you wished no one has ever seen? I have. Oh yes, I have. In a public place. And thank god we were both mortified and said a quick hello and went the other way. That poor woman.

I plan on running down the feminine aisle at target in a month screaming NO MORE! all while taking the $20 I just saved by not having to purchase the overnight with wings super pack and buying myself something I totally don't need.