To my adoring fans..

Recently it came to my attention that a certain blog was disabled. I was actually shocked, despite my vulgar mouth and sense of humor, I was shocked.

Let's get something straight peeps. I like to say douche. I use the f word quite frequently. I hate the word vagina. If you cut me off in traffic I will most likely give you a special wave. I DON'T CARE IF YOU DON'T LIKE ME.

I don't shower everyday and I hate makeup. (Okay, lie. I love makeup, but I don't wear it everyday. I collect crazy eye shadows and love Sephora.) I don't cake it on everyday and my hair is usually pulled back. I like unusual music and read books about the devil, and heavy metal-sometimes. (contrary to popular belief, Cinderella and Bon Jovi are not metal) I also like Kenny Rogers. I believe in god, but I also believe in things that people who believe in god, shouldn't believe in(according to the people who believe in god).

I like death metal. I wear mostly black all the time. Some of my best friends are religious and they DON'T CARE THAT I DON'T GO TO CHURCH. Although they do get me to go sometimes. I have 13 tattooes and want 13 more.

Most of the time when I open my mouth, a word comes out that will offend someone. I DON'T CARE. If I wanted to be like susie homemaker, I wouldn't be blogging because apparently that is something only douchebag people do. People who like to say CHRISTMAS and EASTER EGG and celebrate HALLOWEEN while eating SCHWEDDY BALLS ice cream.

BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND I CAN SAY FUCK IF I WANT TO.

I don't care if you don't like me. I don't care if you think the f word is the worst word you have ever heard in your life, trust me, it isn't. I don't care if you disagree with my style, my personality, and my behavior.

To all the people who are offended by me, pull the stick out of your butt and hit yourself with it. For every blog that offends you, there are 10 more that will pop up. If you don't like what I write, GO ELSEWHERE. What gives you the right to tell me what I can and cannot write? While you are busy trying to ban christmas and religion and halloween costumes, I am enjoying my life and laughing. If you don't like schweddy balls ice cream, then don't fucking eat it!

Apparently there is a state in america you can go and live that doesn't have any of those things that bad people like to partake in, like alcohol, fun, and schweddy balls ice cream. Do you really want me to go there?

While you are too busy trying to 'shut me out', you aren't seeing that I am also a mother, a wife, a business owner, a student, a volunteer, a friend, and a good person. My heart isn't black, I love old doggies, and my favorite book is Alice in Wonderland.

Or is Alice taboo also because it's the nightmarish recalling from a bad acid trip? Maybe that's why I like it...

To sum it up, don't read my blog if you are a conservative bore who doesn't want to see how real people live and talk. If you like to have fun, then read on my friends. Some days are better than others and some days there isn't anything at all. Because I work and have a life and shit to do. I don't talk politics or religion. I hate pastels and don't belong to a book club because I am too opinionated, and because I read books that most wouldn't even pick up. I hate racists and assholes. (which is basically the same thing)

I will leave you with the great words of Sam Halpern (better known as the dad from shitmydadsays) 

"They're offended? Fuck, shit, asshole, shitfuck; they're just words...Fine. Shitfuck isn't a word, but you get my point."